I'm worried about America. I'm worried about it's seemingly irreconcilable political religious and social polarity, it's knee jerk reactions to problems that were years in the making and will take years to solve, it's general impatience, the rise in covert racism, suspicion and paranoia. (By the way- this is not one of 'funny' stories, so don't hit 'Read More' if you're looking for a laugh. Anyway, it seems these days I'm never that funny anyway; it's just that Unconfirmed Sources let's me say what I want, so I do.) Up till now, I've mostly been dismissive of The Tea Party- that loose amalgamation of diverse groups all brought together by their love of tri-corn hats and 'Don't Tread On Me' flags.
Ohhh, that is horrible! I think it's best we not tell you. We wouldn't want to spoil the surprise. Not much chance of that, because you will look awfully surprised when it happens.
Perceptive User 1: LOL
Perceptive User 2: LOL, ZOMG, LOLLERSKATES... LOL.
No? Well you should be, the latest news is you are about to get fired!
You win a punch in the face!
Unsuspecting internet user stumbles upon pagewars.com, worst website in the universe.